just so you know...

National Pork Board Annoyed by the Selling of Canned Unicorn Meat.

Frenchman slays cellmate, then "cooked them up with garlic, shallots and left over rice."

Gulf Oil Cap-Uncapped.

Lady Gaga brings dead bodies on tour as stage props.

An amusing poll gives estimates on Americans views on the future.

Music of the Spheres: The soundwaves emitted by quantum particles and solar storms.

Queen knighting Patrick Stewart with a Bat'leth...

Bilderberg Group goes public, begins friendly PR.
Blacker than Black: Radiation-soaking metamaterial.
The Sound of a Little Bang.
Strange Military experiments.
Japanese asteroid probe recovered.
Extinction by asteroid: inevitable.
The Oceans of Mars.
Dolphin Diplomacy.
The Ahab Parallax.
The iPhone credit system and the banned materials list.

Self-assembling, flying robot drones and self-aware internet.
Documentaries on Existence and Meaning.

Faith in Science: A new religion, a new priesthood. Where Cosmic Awe comes with it's own new set of apologetics; Magic Black Energy, Cosmic Quintessence, and the Sleeper Field. Of course, these theories could be mathematically extrapolated from base models themselves built from faulty readings and false assumptions.
The Essential tenant of Man-Machine Integration.
Some within the ranks rankle, point to short-sighed track record of the species and limitation of the human brain itself. (All the more reason to start augmenting it with better hardware.)

"The second angel poured out his bowl on the sea, and it turned into blood like that of a dead man, and every living thing in the sea died."
-Revelations 16:3

Estimates of oil leak doubles. Again. Some experts think even this is far too low, so don't be surprised when the numbers continue to rise.
Estimates will quadruple if they ever start counting the "magic plumes,"which appear from nowhere and continue into forever.

And cleaning the little birds off won't do any good. They are poisoned and insane inside. Just like us.
The filth of our arrogance is so thick now, sudden and visible in it's horrible effect.

One hundred years after his death, Mark Twain's final and complete autobiography to be published.
Quest For Whiskey!
Surprise: Sunscreen causes cancer. And most herbal supplements are toxic and contaminated.
Cults, Conspiracy, Enemy of Governments: WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange.
Heroin Therapy.
Cybernetics researcher infects himself with computer virus.
Biometrics and Thought Crime.
Columbia graduate steals speech from comedian.